Apr 1, 2010

I'm A Cheat

Yes, I admit it, I'm a cheat. But not to be devious or selfish.... the cheating is more of an attempt to not bore you all to tears, so you'll thank me in the long run, I know you will.

My fave blogger Jamie (or should I say J@mie - he'll get it), from Life and Times of a Househusband, has tagged me with a mystery photo meme (gee thanks, what an honour, such a privelege, blah blah). I am supposed to go to my first folder, find the 10th photo and tell you the story behind it. With some trepidation about what long-forgotten gem of a shot I might be unearthing, I opened the first folder and discovered there were only four pics in it. So onto the second folder, but then I started to worry....do I find the 10th pic here in the second, or the 6th pic, making it the 10th overall including the four from the first? I don't know. If this is starting to sound like the Abbott and Costello baseball sketch to you, welcome to my world.

I counted through the photos and quickly came to the conclusion it didn't matter whether I chose the 6th, the 10th, or made an orchestrally-enhanced powerpoint presentation of the whole damn folder, they were boring. Really boring. The 6th was of a wall. The 10th was of a kitchen sink. Seven, eight and nine ....wall, pantry, wall. Kitchen renovation, circa 2005, in case you haven't guessed.

Okay, I love renovating, it's in my blood, and we have been working steadily on this house since we moved in more than six years ago. I have pretty much designed everything, drawn up plans, organised and managed builders constantly and I love it, almost thrive on it. But the truth is, other people's renovation stories can be mind-numbingly boring. Talking about them face to face is okay, you can ask questions and have a laugh about the incompetent permanently plastered plasterer or the singing millionaire bricklayer. But reading about them is not so entertaining, unless you have some major Frank Spencer-ish disasters or your house becomes a real life version of Tom Hanks' Money Pit.

We have had our fair share of ladder/chainsaw incidents, cutting through live wires, and trees being struck by lightning and falling onto sheds, but the majority of it is mundane and tedious. I acknowledge that you really do not want to read me going on about how we "..knocked this wall down and moved that there to open up the space and it's so hard finding good tradesmen and they were always late and I had boxes of stuff everywhere, could hardly move around the house and the dust, omg, I will be cleaning up plaster and brick dust for all eternity and the electrician was absolutely gorgeous, I just wish we'd had more work for him at the time so he could've stayed longer and the cost of everything is just atrocious and nothing is ever finished when they say it will be and..." zzzzzzzzzzz.

I refuse to do that to you, and there is certainly no captivating tale I can fabricate around a photo of a wall or sink. I may be a cheat but I'm not a liar, I have some principles. Well, a few. One or two. Let's not nit-pick.

What to do then? I considered telling Jamie that I had a hormonal moment, got the numbers mixed up, and accidentally but fortuitously went to the first photo in the 10th folder. But as they say, the truth will out and I am way too honest .... and he knows that I never do as I'm told in these meme things anyway and I would've never heard the end of it until I admitted my porky pie.

So yes, I cheated, I deliberately, intentionally, on purpose went to the 10th folder, looked at the first photo, decided it was a nice one, so here it is.


A shot of my son at Adelaide Oval during a Test match between Australia and the West Indies, taken in November 2005.

Only I'm stuck again now. You see, I didn't take the photo, I wasn't even there. I can't even tell you a great story, like Jamie did for his photo, about what I was doing at the time as I have no sodding clue. I could hazard a guess and say if the boys were at the cricket on what looks to be a cold and cloudy day, then I was probably home with my daughter watching one of the Harry Potter dvds for the 438th time, drinking tea and eating Tim Tams.

Wait a minute, November 2005... so it was about two months after the kitchen renovation finished... oh... crap.
I know what I was doing.
I was planning the bathroom renovation... I'll shut up now.


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